Nautica. Tommy Hilfilger. Ann Taylor. Polo Ralph Lauren. These are some big names, and Melissa Cohen worked for them all. Then came the pandemic, and the fashion industry was hit hard. Melissa lost her dream job. But instead of sitting down, she reinvented herself, becoming a force on LinkedIn and creating her own company. She openly shares three critical things and the mindset shift that can help you land, plant, and grow after a major setback.
About Melissa Cohen
Melissa Cohen’s long tenure as a fashion industry executive included roles with major American brands such as Ralph Lauren, Nautica, and Tommy Hilfiger.
During the COVID-19 pandemic, she launched her own consultancy providing start up and growth stage brands with strategic sourcing and product development expertise.
A LinkedIn aficionado, Melissa found her calling in helping others to love the platform as much as she does. She works with private clients as well as cohorts to build their brands, build their businesses, and build their networks. Melissa was recognized by the LinkedIn editorial team in January 2024 as a LinkedIn Top Voice.
She is the Chief Engagement Officer of DIY Influence (www.DIYInfluence.com), a collaborative membership community designed to help you develop your voice, find your audience, and build your business.
Melissa lives in New York City and is passionate about supporting girls and women in their educational and career journeys. She is a board member of Her Move Next, a 501(C)3 charity dedicated to empowering girls and young women through chess, community, and competition, and was a founding member of Chief.
She is the co-author of the Amazon Bestselling book, Your Career Resilience
Blueprint: A Tactical Guide to Navigate Change, Overcome Obstacles, and Design Your Future.
Resources
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Transcript
Note: This was AI-generated and only lightly edited
Bonnie Habyan:
Hey there, it’s your pal, Bonnie Habyan, and welcome to the Worth Knowing Podcast. If you like a real-life story that features grit, grace, and a whole lot of gumption, then you’re in the right place. Get ready to hear from some courageous women who talk about how pivotal, teachable, aha moments have reshaped their confidence and delivered opportunities they never imagined. It didn’t happen by chance, of course. Mm-mm. They figured out new, sometimes uncomfortable ways to put themselves out there in a way that shouts, they get it. You’ll hear intimate stories with actionable takeaways and some very secret sauce. Because everyone has an important story worth knowing. And you know what? The world needs it, and you deserve it. My guest today is Melissa Cohen, and her journey is a testament to resilience, reinvention, and the power of personal branding. Now, Melissa’s world turned a bit upside down when she lost her job at her dream company during the pandemic. But today she’s emerged as a LinkedIn top voice, helping others harness the platform’s potential. In this sit down with me, Melissa and I explore her remarkable transformation and the lessons she’s learned along the way. So first of all, Melissa, it is a pleasure to have you. I feel like I know you already a little bit because we’ve gone back and forth the last couple of years as we’ve both made this LinkedIn journey a little bit, but I want to just kind of frame this for our listeners. Melissa, you went from fashion industry VP to unemployed in the blink of an eye. So I want you to tell me a little bit about your career journey and then bring us up to that moment that has kind of really just redefined and helped you reinvent your new future. So let’s go back a little bit. Tell us about where you started and then that moment during the pandemic.
Melissa Cohen: So where I started, started in a very entry level role that I was very fortunate to have. I did not take a traditional path into the fashion industry, even though it is what I always wanted to do. I did not end up majoring. in college in a fashion field. I actually was a foreign language major. I majored in Italian language and literature, which was fantastic. I studied abroad in Rome. I had a wonderful experience. It was possibly not the most practical major for a doctor.
Bonnie Habyan: What did your parents say about that one?
Melissa Cohen: It’s funny. My parents, I don’t know how it happened, honestly. My dad wanted me to be an accountant, but that really was not going to be for me.
Bonnie Habyan: That’s way off.
Melissa Cohen: Yeah, that’s definitely not what I see. Very way off. Yeah. They were very supportive of my educational choice. And I think they were happy I was reasonably close to home. I didn’t go super far. I lived on campus, but it wasn’t that far away. So maybe I got a little bit of wiggle room with a major based on that. But, you know, I graduated in a not so great economy. I actually had a very hard time finding a corporate job at first. I worked in retail management for a year as an assistant manager for a clothing store. And, you know, big kudos and big props to people who stay in the retail industry because that is seriously hard work. It is. It is. It was not for me, for sure. And so I was very fortunate. I got a job with PVH, which is, you know, still a very well-known company today. And I just sort of worked my way up the ladder from there. I went to a few different organizations based on, you know, what opportunities were there for me. So I had the pleasure of working for some really great brands. I worked for Nautica, I worked for Tommy Hilfiger, I worked for Ann Taylor. And then I was at Ralph, which, you know, was such a dream company for me. truly believe it is one of the absolute best lifestyle brands out there. I think everything that Mr. Lauren himself does is just incredible. He has such a vision and such a way of bringing people into his vision and into his world. And so I was there for about 11 years.
Bonnie Habyan: So, and take me into the daily life of that. I mean, people who hear about this, we, you know, we watch Devil Wears Prada, we watch, you know, these various different things that we see in the media, but what is it like to work for a very large brand? I can’t imagine what that must feel like. So give us a little bit.
Melissa Cohen: So I think your experience is going to really vary depending on what division you work in, what your role is. Are you in design? Are you in sourcing? Are you in merchandising? Are you in marketing, PR? Because it’s such a large organization, you have teams that handle all of these different facets of the business. And so for me, I was in manufacturing and sourcing, and so that meant The easiest way to explain it is I was sort of the liaison between design and the final product in the factories, right? I would find the factory to make the product. I would negotiate the lead times, the cost. I would troubleshoot along the production process. I would work with all of my cross-functional partners, design, merchandising, technical design, to get the product to meet the design team’s aesthetic. while also hitting the margin goals for the organization, right? Because those two things can sometimes be a little bit at odds, right? The creative side and the business side. You have to find that sweet spot where it still is meeting the designer’s goals, but it’s also profitable, right? It’s hitting the target price that the merchandiser needs to sell at a specific price in the store.
Bonnie Habyan: Right. So this is in New York City, right? Yes. So you are living the dream, okay? You know, well, for the most part, I would think, you know, most people think that’s pretty cool. It is pretty cool. And kudos to you. You’ve made your dream come true. And here you are. And then the pandemic comes. And everybody knows what happens when the pandemic hits. I don’t think we have to do too much to explain that. Kind of tell me where you were in your mind thinking about things are OK, things aren’t OK. You see things happening around you. And then kind of take us to that moment when your life kind of changes.
Melissa Cohen: Yeah, so I mean, this was 2020, obviously. Everybody had a really tough COVID experience. I don’t think anybody did not have a really tough COVID experience. I do think there was something exceptionally difficult about having a COVID experience in New York City. you know, we were really the epicenter of COVID in the United States.
Bonnie Habyan: You’re right. You’re right. And you know what? I’m going to tell you something. I remember seeing it come in our area because I lived right outside of the city at that point on Long Island. And my family would be like, why are you making such a big, big, you know, big thing about this? I said, give it three weeks. You have no idea what’s coming. And they really had, but we were there, we were in the middle of it all. And you’re right, that ripple effect was just hugely felt. So go ahead.
Melissa Cohen: Yeah. So you know, we we were in very big lockdowns. We were very much isolated. And there was just a real feeling of fear, right? Because this was so unknown. You didn’t know what to believe. You didn’t know what was fact what was hyperbole. You know, I think I look back on those days sometimes and I don’t know how But we all got through it with our sanity because I just remember Lysol wiping groceries.
Bonnie Habyan: I know. The gloves. Yes. And the Amazon box would stay outside for day two.
Melissa Cohen: Yes. Absolutely. We don’t have a garage, but it would sit out on your balcony or whatever outdoor space you had. It was crazy. It was absolutely crazy.
Bonnie Habyan: Yeah, the economic impact, just it, of course, to everyone. And of course, the industry you’re in.
Melissa Cohen: Yes. I mean, fashion was hit super hard, right? Nobody was buying clothes because nobody was going anywhere. What did you need to buy any clothes for? There were no parties. There were no weddings. There were no you weren’t going into the office. Right. The only thing that maybe you were buying outside of of face masks, maybe you needed some more yoga pants for your Zoom calls. I mean, that was that was it.
Bonnie Habyan: You’re right. You’re right. All right. Then I assume just like you said, everyone, nobody was immune to the effect. I had it around my company as well. What kind of happens? You start seeing things being restructured, people losing their jobs, and you don’t take these things personally. It is what it is.
Melissa Cohen: It is what it is. I think in any situation, a layoff is usually not personal. Right. And that that’s a hard thing when it happens to you. It’s also a hard thing when you have to do it. You know, I had to do this layoffs as well at various points in in my career. And it’s really hard. You know, you see these people every single day. And I know, you know, pre covid, we spent so much of our waking time in the office. You know, it’s not funny, but we would sometimes joke that we saw our co-workers more than we saw our families. 100%. And in my role in particular, you know, I traveled a lot. I traveled to Asia four times a year, usually for about two weeks at a time. And I became super close with those people that I traveled with, right? You are on a flight for 16 hours together. You are getting around a foreign country together. You’re eating together. You’re borrowing clothes from each other because, oh my God, I forgot to bring X, Y, Z. You’re you’re supporting each other through these trips, right? We had young children at home that we missed, and just helping each other through these things, you become so close to each other that it is really hard when, A, if you’re laying those people off, but B, when it happens to you, I’ve heard people say that losing a job is almost akin to a death, and I understand that.
Bonnie Habyan: I do. I do. I think our identities, you know, are so much tied to that. And of course, when you know that it has nothing to do with your performance, and at the same time, you’re in this crazy environment that it’s not just that, okay, now go find a new job. Now you’re trying to find a job in a pandemic where everything has changed. Everything is uncertain. You know, you don’t know what’s going to be in a month, two months, three months. So that fear of the unknown can really be quite crippling.
Bonnie Habyan: So this happens to you, and now you have to say, okay, what am I going to do now? And take us through that, because I think it’s so important for people listening to understand, A, they’re not alone. B, it happens to everybody some point in their career. But three, it’s the resiliency. It’s getting knocked over, but still having the strength to get up and say, you know what, despite not feeling good, I’m pushing through because I know there’s light on the other side. I want to hear about your light because you’ve created a tremendous amount on LinkedIn. For those of you who don’t know Melissa, she really does have a wonderful following. I’ve watched her grow from, I don’t know, maybe just a few hundred to a thousand followers to just this, you know, she just really, really has evolved on that platform. But, you know, it’s been kind of cool watching her do that. But I also know having spoken with her at some point when we had just kind of connected, She’d gone through something bad. So I want her to kind of share her light to help others. So let’s hear your light, Melissa.
Melissa Cohen: So you’re 100% right. It does happen to almost everyone at some point. I mean, I’m sure there’s exceptions. Not many. I was going to say, pretty much everyone that I know has lost a job at some point. Many people that I know more than once. And that is also just indicative of where we are today. It is no longer the norm that you stay with the same company for 40 years and you get a gold watch and a pension. That just doesn’t exist anymore. And so I think there’s been a shift in the idea of loyalty on both sides of the equation, right? Companies are no longer so loyal to employees and employees are no longer so loyal to companies.
Bonnie Habyan: No, and they’re dictating their terms, especially after the pandemic, you know, the whole remote scenario is no longer a luxury. It’s now like, well, you know, I’m going to look for the job that allows me to do remote or hybrid. It’s changed everything.
Melissa Cohen: It has absolutely a hundred percent changed everything. And so, yeah. So, um, here I was sitting here in New York city, um, without a job. and in an industry that was not hiring people, right? Because so many people were in the same situation that I was, laid off or furloughed or just desperately hoping that their job didn’t go away and probably doing the job of two or three people now to make up for some headcount reductions. My husband was working from home. My daughter was a high school freshman at the time and she was, you know, remote learning. And we are in a New York City apartment Very, very severe lockdowns and a lot of fear, right? Still not sure what activities are really safe. How much time can you spend out outside outdoors? How close can you get to people? Do masks really work? Like all these questions, right? And so you mentioned LinkedIn. was never a social media user. I, to this day, have never used Facebook ever. And if I haven’t by now, I don’t think that I will. I joined Instagram two weeks ago.
Bonnie Habyan: Oh, congratulations. Thank you. They say you’re supposed to do that when you master one platform. So I assume that’s probably your, you’ve mastered one, so you’re going for the second.
Melissa Cohen: I entered this century, yes, and I have an Instagram account. I have had a LinkedIn account since 2008 and I did absolutely nothing with that LinkedIn account for 12 years. If you asked to connect with me I would have gotten an email telling me so and I probably accepted if I knew who you were and I’m very sure that I would have known who you were because you would have had absolutely no reason to connect with me if you didn’t know who I was because I wasn’t doing anything. And so you know when I lost my job and realized sort of the direness of the situation I was in, I said, oh wow, I better go on LinkedIn and I better do something. Because at least I felt like I was doing something, right? And so I fixed up my profile and I added some things to my homepage. But the biggest thing that I started doing is I started to speak to people there. Yep. And I did that. I was I was not ready to post my own content yet. That was just too scary for me. But I started to comment on other people’s content that I found interesting, that was relevant to my industry, or that spoke to a theme that I found resonated with me. And much to my surprise, people would actually answer back. And we would have, you know, a little bit of a conversation and this was like a lifeline for me, right? Because I felt so socially isolated.
Bonnie Habyan: Yeah. They were saying, yeah. And they do say that’s why they believe as well, LinkedIn has really exploded since the pandemic. And it really has because of that social isolation and now this new sense of community.
Melissa Cohen: LinkedIn began to function as a virtual water cooler. firmly believe that. This is a seismic shift for the platform. It was not like this in 2015, 2016. It was where you went when you needed a job. I know. That was it. You’re right. And so slowly, I started to really look forward to spending time there. I started to want to see how these new people who had entered my life, at least virtually, how they were doing, what were they talking about? What was going on with them? They were definitely posting more personal content, or at least things that were a blend of professional and personal. And I wanted to see how everyone was doing. How is everybody coping during this really stressful time? What were people talking about? And yes, looking for a job as well. And then one day I just decided, okay, I am going to post something. I’m going to be really brave and I’m going to make that first post. I wanted to throw up. I can’t say it any other way. I felt really nauseous. After I did it, I wanted to take it down, but I didn’t. Remember what it’s about? What was it about?
Bonnie Habyan: Oh, it’s terrible. It is. It is everything.
Melissa Cohen: You need to post that now just for fun. No, I did once probably about a year and a half ago. I was like, I just want you all to see my first post. I want you to see how it’s OK to be afraid and do something anyway. And you will grow from that experience. It is everything that I tell clients not to do. So it was a repost of a WWD article, which is Women’s Wear Daily, which is, you know, like one of the premier publications, although it’s all online now, but publications for the fashion industry. And so first of all, it is firewalled, right? Because it’s a paid subscription. No one, even if you wanted to read it, you can’t read it unless you subscribe. And reposts never perform well. And I think I wrote like two sentences of my own. Yeah, check this out. Yeah, this will be interesting. You know, I don’t even remember what I said. Interesting read. It’s terrible.
Bonnie Habyan: It was terrible. But that’s the steps you have to take in this journey. So it’s completely the right thing.
Melissa Cohen: And nobody was mean to me. Nobody told me to leave. Nobody said, what are you posting that nonsense for? It got a handful of likes. Somebody actually reposted it, which was like, they must have felt sorry for me.
Bonnie Habyan: They were following in your footsteps. It was their first post.
Melissa Cohen: I was like, wow, somebody reposted my repost. That’s amazing. But that was the start of it all for me was I survived that first post. And I just went from there. And I’ve actually really enjoyed going back sometimes and looking at the progression of my content and how much better it’s gotten because it wasn’t great at the beginning. It really wasn’t.
Bonnie Habyan: No. And it’s when you do have that passion. I love how you’re about, and I forget exactly what it says, but it’s something very cute about your passion with LinkedIn. What is the first sentence to your about? It’s very cute. I want you to love LinkedIn as much as I do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That’s it. I think that’s so cute. But not everybody gets it, right? So at some point you’re out there, I mean, what you say about people and their jobs, I still see it. I’ll see people that I have not seen ever on the platform who are my husband’s friends or somebody I know, boom, they’re there. And it’s all about, hey, I’m looking for a new job. And I just blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I never see them again. Right? So those days are gone. But I do recall when you were first finding your voice, and I tell everyone, it definitely I think it takes a few years to find that kind of comfort zone, right? When did you all of a sudden see this is not just a path for being social, this may be a path to my career, my new me?
Melissa Cohen: So it’s interesting. I guess it happened in two ways. One, people started to reach out to me and say, I love what you’re doing on LinkedIn. Can you teach me how you did it? I want to do it too. That’s amazing. And that was interesting to me because I didn’t think I was… quote unquote, doing anything. It didn’t occur to me at the time that this was something that people wanted to learn how to do. And then the other thing that probably the biggest catalyst was, so another thing that I do in addition to working individually with clients and groups is I have a monthly membership community with a business partner of mine. The way that happened is she sent me a DM on LinkedIn and she said, I’d like to have you on my podcast. Would you be interested in doing it? And I said, sure. I think it was probably like maybe the third podcast I’d ever been on. I said, sure, that’ll be fun. And we had a great time. You know, the recording session was fun. It felt very much like this does, right? Like talking with a friend, talking with someone that you had a real rapport with. And after that, she reached back out to me and she said, you’re really good at branding, at LinkedIn, at helping others to see their potential. I teach this personal branding bootcamp, would you be interested in teaching it together?” And I was extremely intrigued, right? This was something that had never really crossed my mind that this was a whole career opportunity. And plus you’re helping someone. That’s what makes it meaningful for me. There’s so much joy and personal satisfaction in doing this, right? When I work with someone, and it could be someone one-on-one or it could be in that boot camp that I’m still teaching, we have a couple of them every year, and the positive feedback that I get and how much more comfortable I’ve made someone or how much clarity someone has gotten around their brands, right? And I know personal brands is like this very buzzy, buzzword kind of saying, and so some people will just roll their eyes at it, but it’s so important. When I lost my job, I lost so much of my own identity. I know. I know. And I don’t ever want someone else to be in that position.
Bonnie Habyan: You know what, that is so funny because that’s why I am doing the podcast, why I go out there and express myself. Never ever want to feel vulnerable like we all felt during that time. And the best way to do that is to take ownership and to start showing your worth. Start showing your value, become worth knowing. Hence the title of the podcast. That’s what I’m hoping this podcast teaches others, empowers others. Has someone like you that comes on and says, listen, you know, I, we all go through bad things, but when you start to kind of pivot a little bit, you find out and start recognizing your superpowers, go with those superpowers. It can take you to all kinds of new places that give you new sense of fulfillment, not just a check, but this great feeling that you can have when someone’s scared to death or sick to their stomach to post something and you help them get over that hurdle and just start having this new confidence in a digital world, which is so important.
Melissa Cohen: It is so important. It is so crucial. I think we are still very much at the beginning of understanding the power and the value of having a recognizable personal brand. I think we’re just at the beginning of understanding how much these platforms can assist us in being resilient in our careers, right?
Bonnie Habyan: And that’s what it’s about, right? I mean, let me ask you a question because mentorship is so important. So you go through this and it’s kind of a real rough thing for you. Who was your mentor? Who were your people that you leaned on? Who kind of helped you through or was that really what you found in the platform of LinkedIn?
Melissa Cohen: Yeah, it’s a mix of both. Right. So my family first. Right. My parents, huge support. My husband, my daughter. If you ever want to feel good about yourself, you know, just have your daughter tell you how wonderful you are. Oh, thank you, Chloe. She she has the biggest heart and she was my was and is my biggest cheerleader. I had a very close colleague from Ralph who was one of those people that I traveled with all the time. And we spoke every day for I can’t tell you how long. And that was a huge, that was a huge support for me, right? Still feeling like, okay, I’m not there anymore. But it’s not like everybody forgot about me the minute the door closed. Right? Yeah. And then, you know, you said something really interesting. Was it just this platform? And I have met some of the most incredible people on the platform that are my friends in real life. You know, I’m fortunate that I live in New York City, so a lot of people either live here or come here, you know, either for a visit or for work, a conference, whatever it might be. So I’ve had the pleasure of meeting a lot of those people that I met only on LinkedIn in person. And some of them are truly very, very dear friends of mine and big, big pieces of my support system. I also had a former boss from Ralph. She was not my boss anymore at the time that I lost my job, but she was a huge support too because she had been my mentor for many years when I did work for her for a number of years until she was moved to a different part of the organization. And she was a huge support too. And so I think it’s a really important question, right? You have to have those people who are truly your people who are going to be there to support you and build those relationships before you need them and nurture them and don’t have them be transactional, right? Like you were talking about those people that they show up when they need a job and then you never hear from them again. Don’t be that person. Keep your relationships going.
Bonnie Habyan: Yeah, I think in those times, and we’ve all had them again, you know, that moment when you just, oh my gosh, I never want to go back there again. I do think people show their true colors and those folks who are there for you rise to a different level in your realm of importance of people who are, you know, your tribe, right? So I think it’s really really telling sometimes when you look back, you know, we learn a lot from those things as well. The wisdom we get from those things are truly important. Now I want to touch on a little bit some of the things that you advise to other folks who find them in a situation that is at a crossroads, that you now can either lay down and just say, oh, well, that’s it. I guess I’ll just pack it in or say, no, no, no, no, no. This is an opportunity to do something different and new. And wow, you know what? I’m just going to see where it takes me. So what are some things that you would kind of put out there to, you know, the theme of this is kind of like three steps to figure out how and when you pivot to something positive.
Melissa Cohen: So a long, long time ago, my mom gave me a piece of advice and she said, you can’t control what happens to you in most of the time, but you can control how you react to it. And I think that is, the most important thing to remember, things are going to happen to you, you’re going to get laid off, you’re going to get moved to a different part of an organization and be unhappy, you’re going to take a job that didn’t turn out to be what you expected it to be. You’re gonna go on a lot of interviews and think that you have this role, you know, in the bag, and then you’re gonna get the worst. You can only control what you do from there. So that’s actually, that was the final straw, so to speak, of why I decided to go out on my own, right? I had two interviewing experiences for two different roles sort of in parallel that were incredibly frustrating. They were both situations where I had been referred personally to the organizations, right? Exactly the thing you’re supposed to do, you know, Know someone who knows someone who can make that warm introduction. You’re not just sending your resume in to get lost in a big system. And one of the roles, I had a fair number of interviews, not a crazy amount, but a fair amount. And they even sent a car to take me to one of their stores so that I could evaluate their product and do a whole sort of synopsis of what I thought was lacking and what I would add and where I saw opportunities. And then when I was waiting for the next round to be scheduled, I was on LinkedIn and I noticed a job posting from that organization that made absolutely no sense to me based on the whole structure we’ve been talking about all these weeks. And so I knew the person, the head of HR, I knew them from a previous life. And so I reached out and I said, I don’t understand what I’m seeing here. This doesn’t really make sense. And so long story longer, they were completely restructuring and the role that I was interviewing for was no longer in existence.
Bonnie Habyan: Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. And you find out from LinkedIn because you’re like putting dots together and saying, wait, wait a minute. And was this like the same day or the day after or close to the time after you had taken that car to go do the assessment or was it?
Melissa Cohen: That’s a good question. Maybe a week or so, week or two. Yeah. It’s pretty close. Oh no, it was close because I was kind of like, why haven’t I heard anything? And listen, these things happen. I think you said it, though. My biggest frustration was, why am I calling you? Why aren’t you telling me? But at least, you know, they were upfront about it from that point on. And that was fine, because I had this other opportunity that honestly, I thought was a better fit for me anyway. And so I was like, that’s okay, all these things happen for a reason. And I’m going to focus on this one now. I had a lot of interviews with the second org. I don’t remember the number, but it was a lot. It was everyone from HR to cross-functional partners to the person I would be reporting to, all the way up to the president of the organization. And the last conversation that I had with their head of HR was, you’re our front-running candidate. I’m meeting with the president again on Monday to discuss the next steps, and I will keep you closely posted. And I never heard from them again.
Bonnie Habyan: Yeah. And I just said enough. Yeah. And you know what? Our listeners, just everybody has this story. Everyone does. In some respects, I feel like they should pay you for your time. I mean, like there should be some law, there should be some protocol, there should be, you must at least let the candidate know. I just think we’ve all been through that. But boy, does that knock you a little bit for a self-confidence perspective, especially when you’ve put your, your soul into all of this whole process, right? And then you say, well, gosh, could I have done anything different? No. You know what? In some respects, if that’s how the organization is, you don’t want to work there. That’s my take.
Melissa Cohen: I don’t disagree. And the only thing that The whole reason that I said I do not want to do this anymore was the lack of professionalism. I am a grown-up person. You can send me, you ideally would call me given the amount of time and effort and energy I’ve invested in this interview process. And same thing, going to stores on my own and doing a product analysis and, you know, looking at their sourcing strategy and coming up with suggestions, just send me an email saying, we loved meeting you. You were a wonderful candidate. We went in another direction, but we wish you the best of luck.
Bonnie Habyan: Yeah, I would have not been great. But at the same time, at least you have closure and you’re like, all right, move on. Pull myself up and move on. So one of the first pieces of advice that you said, and I do love it, I think your mom’s very wise. I had a wise mom too. You cannot control the things that happen to you, but you can control your reaction. So give me another one or two, because I think people need to take away the things that they need, you know, three pieces of advice to help you kind of pivot. Okay. So in that context, you’re saying, listen, things happen. You can’t just say, okay, darn, darn, darn, the whole life I’m going to be so mad. No, you can’t control that. That you can control pulling up your socks and moving in a different direction. So that’s hugely important for everyone. Own it. Own that situation and make it yours. Number two,
Melissa Cohen: Figure out what really matters to you. And what I decided really mattered to me was taking control of my own situation. And I said, I don’t want to do this anymore. I don’t want to be at someone else’s mercy of deciding whether they want me to work for them. I want to decide who I’m going to say yes and no to. That’s scary, though. Was it scary? Very scary. A thousand percent. The first consulting client I got was because of a conversation I had with a former coworker. She had been one of my design partners at Ralph. She had been let go from the organization. a number of years ago at that point, and she had reached out to me and said, I met this person who I think you should speak with. She has a home decor business, and she’s thinking about launching a line of children’s apparel. So I think you would be great to partner with her. I think it would be a great project for you, a great consulting project. I know you’re still looking for full-time, but Melissa, seriously, I never want another full-time job again.” And I was horrified.
Bonnie Habyan: What do you mean? What’s wrong with you? I know, don’t make me laugh, but people say that to me too, like when you’re going to dial it back a notch. What do you mean by that? I love what I do, but go ahead.
Melissa Cohen: And so was it scary? It was so scary, you know, but I would counter that with, Being in a corporate job is no less scary because they can decide at any time that you’re too expensive, you’re not the right fit, the organization is changing, we’re having a restructure, we just got sold, we’re being acquired. Being in corporate is safe in some ways, but it’s not safe in others. Your job could be gone tomorrow.
Bonnie Habyan: Yeah, another pandemic could come. We don’t know. Something else major can happen and, you know, we’ve seen it all happen. You never, you never, I never thought in my lifetime I’d see something like that happen and not, there’s just no game book for that. Maybe there would be a little bit now, more so, but so many unknowns. So you’re right. All right. So now, so let’s go to point number three. What’s your third piece of advice?
Melissa Cohen: Really sit down and figure out what matters to you. What are your values? What are your non-negotiables? And that should be whether you’re in a corporate role or in an entrepreneurial role. What really matters to you that you’re not willing to compromise on? And let that guide you.
Bonnie Habyan: do some reading and, and worked on a few things myself over the last couple of years and trying to really understand what you’re saying there. And I think it comes down to what your core values are. If your values are success and how you define it, family, integrity, creativity, whatever those things are that make your bucket full. Sometimes I’ve found over the years, maybe 20 years ago, you wouldn’t have had the same, hey, you know what? I’m done with this thing than you do now because you’re stronger in your values. 20 years ago, oh my God, I just have to have a paycheck. Now I’m like been there, done that. I want to do more of the things that align with me in my spirit. right? And the same thing with you. I don’t want to be owned by anybody. I don’t want to be vulnerable. I want to make sure that I’m working for me. You know, maybe flexibility is important. All of these various things may be important. And I think that you did the smart thing, kind of stopping, right? You could have headed back to another job. I’m sure you would have, someone fabulous to have, you would have been wildly successful. But you stopped and paused for a second and said, wait a minute, right? Let me, let me pivot here and think a little bit. So, um, I think all of those points are very, very important. Any other words of wisdom you have for, for maybe someone out there that is going through a career transition, something bad has happened to them?
Melissa Cohen: Know that it’s going to be okay. I did an exercise once in a, in a, in a, leadership group that I was in and it was what would be the title of your autobiography or your memoir and Mine would be it all worked out in the end because it does and it will and You have more control than you think you do Losing your job or or being in a bad work situation, you know, you might be employed but you’re in a really toxic environment or a bad situation it can feel like it’s never going to get better and that you are going to be stuck in this situation forever. And I promise you, you’re not. You just have to take action. And that action can be small because that first step is always the most difficult. I mean, even to pin it back to something as funny as a LinkedIn post, that first step That first tiny ridiculous reposting this article that no one could read because it was paywalled was such a tiny step, but it felt enormous. And then it just got easier. And it’s the same in how wherever you apply that logic, that first step always seems the most daunting and then just keep going.
Bonnie Habyan: And on that note, I’m going to say thank you so much, Melissa. Thanks so much for stopping by. Melissa is, as you can tell, very motivational. So you want to learn more about her, you can do so in the show notes. Thank you for joining us on this episode of Worth Knowing. If you’d like to learn more about our guest story or connect with them, you’ll find their details in the show notes. Remember, the path to worth knowing is paved with courage and insight. Stay inspired, keep striving, and continue to make a difference. Then, you must make sure to share it with others. Until next time, keep chasing those aha moments, my friends. You know, the ones that deliver results and motivate and teach the world. Worth Knowing is produced by Missing Link, a Latina-owned, strategy-driven, creatively-fueled production co-op. From ideation to creation, they craft human connections through intelligent, engaging, and informative content.
